FREEDOM ESSAY PART 1 OF 96

part1.
AyN Rand was most likely a nasty and derisive human being.  after reading Return of the Primitive several years back, I decided to give her a rest.  I really liked Anthem. Still do really. She would probably think of me as a cowardly barbarian too dumbstruck by the machine age to act according to his instincts and too stupid to suppress them and adapt. This unfortunately is not far from the truth.
I feel as though a boot is on my neck, but there is no one around.  I haven't been to a doctor in years and though I feel in good health...the square community will likely view me as a cowardly cave man...afraid of needles and technology, unsure of the knowledge the doctor possesses, and ever suspicious of things that cost money but you don't get anything in return. Perhaps I am still a coward. It is clear that I do not care if I am spied on or not. Fuck it. I'm openly advocating the decriminalization of drugs. I do not trust the "authority" to interpret what i say or how i feel. I know in my heart that I want justice. I feel like I know what it is. The end of war. To invade another people's land is a sign of ineptitude.  To be good at war is to conquer without mercy.  We are not good at war. Our soldiers destroy, and we at home cry about it.  Our confusion and hypocrisy are already at fever pitch. Are we grateful or outraged? both? that doesn't make much sense. After all...we pay for it all supposedly.
The money I have earned in this life is so minuscule in comparison with the topics I think about and try to discuss on a daily basis, it borders on surreal. At the very least...modern culture has reached absurdity in motion. Certainly there has been degradation of the population.  Each time these geniuses get together and worship selfishness at the expense of the general population a little demon is probably born somewhere in the universe.  I can't help but laugh at what all this is. The society is so mean, atrociously mean. Like Nietzsche talked about Germany back in the day.
I can't pretend to be tough. I'm a wad of emotional cookie-dough. I'm a sweetheart.
All of the back and forth has made me woozy.
I think I'm gonna hurl.
ok..i'm back.
I was obsessed with enthymemes for a brief time after college.
Some things are implied without having to be stated.
We are all being manipulated, but we don't know by whom or for what reason beyond a few vague theories.
We don't know how to stand up for ourselves or we would have done it.
They don't teach that. They teach acceptance.